For most of my life, I’ve waited on others to agree to go traveling with me. I’ve always been way too afraid to travel completely by myself in a location where I didn’t know anyone or have school waiting for me. Friends with the best intentions will agree, get excited, and start planning the trip — but once it comes down to actually booking anything, they tend to flake. I’m sure this is an experience to which we can all relate — I’ve been the flaky friend at times too, so I can’t really blame them.
After these past couple of years in the pandemic, I was really looking to travel somewhere. I started to plan a trip with a friend, and she backed out. And instead of canceling like I usually would, I decided to just take the trip solo.
Not only was this a desire to travel, but it was also part of exposure therapy that I talked with my therapist about. I realized how much the pandemic had impacted my ability to go out and about in the world, and how heightened my anxiety was. But I knew I needed to rip the bandaid off and put myself out there.
So in preparing for my first completely solo trip, I looked for ways to alleviate my anxiety and OCD.
First, I made sure to acknowledge my anxiety and made a list of all my potential worries. Writing it down made me realize my worries weren’t as big on paper as they were in my mind, and that I could do things to help alleviate my worries.
Here’s how I tackled those worries:
1. Worry about my safety.
Obviously, as a single woman traveling alone, I was worried about my safety. Particularly, I worried about being in a hotel room alone at night and my fear of someone coming into my room to harm me while I was showering or sleeping. So I looked for ways to feel safer in my room. Here are some that I found:
Door alarm: I bought this door alarm that sounds when someone opens your hotel door. It’s pretty easy to use and lightweight. You just stick the pins in between the door and hang the alarm on the door. I used it every night and felt safer knowing I didn’t need to constantly be checking the door.
Door wedge: These door wedges help prevent someone from opening the door announced. I pair them with the door alarm.
Luggage lock: I mainly use the luggage lock in the hotel room so no one can access any important items I have.
Safety tip: I always leave the “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door and forgo any room service, especially if it’s a short stay. Then you can be sure no one has entered your room. I never had trouble getting more toilet paper or towels by just asking the front desk.
2. Social anxiety
I was going to attend a conference event during my travels where I knew nobody. I was worried about not being able to speak to anyone or making a fool of myself.
So I prepared myself to be uncomfortable. I also promised myself that I would say yes to social invitations, and prepared things that I could talk about during conference sessions.
Even so, it was difficult for me, but I left myself open. I sat at the hotel bar instead of rushing back to my room. I pushed myself to talk to other conference attendees even if I felt awkward.
At the end, I met a lot of great people and ended up with some new potential friends.
3. Fear of getting lost
What happened if my phone lost its battery? If my GPS stopped working? Are Ubers safe? These thoughts circled my mind constantly before my trip.
Portable charger: Bring along a portable charger in case your phone runs of out battery. I know mine did during my long days of taking videos and pictures. You can charge it in your bag as your eating lunch or walking around.
Map out the trip before going: I am a planner, so I mapped out all the locations I needed to go to and kept offline maps just in case my phone died or the data wasn’t working. Of course, I still winged it at times once I felt comfortable with the area.
Ubers are generally safe: just take precautions and make sure you check the license plate of the car you are getting into.
4. Anxiety about my anxiety
I also worried that my anxiety would increase, I’d have a panic attack, or I couldn’t sleep. But I implore you: Do it scared. Do it anxious.
Overall, I had so much fun and found myself not worrying as much during the trip. Once I was out there and moving, the worried that haunted me when alone in my room didn’t bother me as much when I was exploring and having fun.
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